Do your mom friends have guns? No really, wake up and ask.

Probably not the question that crosses your mind to ask when you meet a mom near you for the first time, right?

Like, Hey, it’s already super awkward meeting you and please let me get your number and wow what a great home you have, thanks for inviting us over for this playdate and, um, do you have a gun? Where do you keep it? RANDOM.

Well, not so random, actually. According to an ABC News 20/20 special, hosted by Diane Sawyer, there is a good chance your mom friend does have a gun hanging around, and a pretty solid chance  it’s not locked up.  I repeat – SOLID CHANCE IT’S NOT LOCKED UP.

They state that half of U.S. households contain one or more firearms and reported that 1.7 million children live in a home with an unsecured and loaded firearm. Here is a clip from the video.

Heavy stuff, right?

A few of my close mom friends own guns. One of them has a license to carry so there are times the gun is not locked up in the home and another friend has one propped nearby when bedtime comes around.

(No, this post is NOT about the government and gun control. It’s your freedom to have a gun in your home. I respect that. This post is about understanding the environment our children are playing in so that we can all work together to keep them safe.)

Does this mean these moms are off my playdate list (the moms with unlocked guns)? Well, they happen to live far enough away that playdates haven’t come up yet, but when they do, you can bet your money we will have a serious conversation to make sure those guns are locked away each time we step foot into their homes for playtime. And if there is an issue, they’re off the playdate list. Not the friend list, but the playdate list. End of story.

So please, ask your new mom friends, or anyone who may host your child for that matter, if they have a gun in the house. If they say yes, follow up and ask where and how it is kept. This isn’t about making mom friends, ladies. Okay, it is about making mom friends, but if someone is turned off by genuine concern for the safety of your child when there are unlocked guns around, she might not be best mom friend for you.

And if you do find out there is a gun in another mom’s home, treat the situation as if it were your own home. Just because you have certain childproofing expectations does not mean your mom friends are on the same page.  If they hide it in a closet, can you picture your child finding it? There will be a time when the kids can walk and explore. There will be a time when you give them their independence. And if your child is like mine and many of the kids in this video, he will climb and do what it takes to figure out ANY complicated object. And chances are, at some point he’ll turn that object on himself or his playdate. It’s just not worth it.

I would love to hear from other moms on this. Let’s keep the conversation going.

 

14 thoughts on “Do your mom friends have guns? No really, wake up and ask.

  1. So many wild inaccuracies! Get your facts straight and stop trying to scare people into being on board with your agenda.

    • Inaccuracies such as….? If you’re accusing someone else of not getting facts right, you should have some of your own.

  2. LOVE this post! Definitely something everyone needs to think about, regardless of anyone’s individual position on gun control. Of course nobody wants their kids harmed including the gun owner’s. I can see how children’s safety is worth an uncomfortable conversation. Thanks for the food for thought.

  3. Just Wow. That’s my first reaction to this blog post. I have to say though, I’m pleased to see comments above me such as, So many wild inaccuracies!” and “Another Liberal agenda pushing post.” That is so true. The only source this post cites is an ABC News 20/20 study. Believing just one news report without doing any research is (in my opinion) ridiculous.

    These links explain the inaccuracies that this news report fail to mention:
    http://www.thetruthaboutguns.com/2014/01/robert-farago/abc-airs-anti-gun-agitprop-for-the-children/http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2014/02/07/abc-news-reports-on-guns-mislead-americans/
    http://crimepreventionresearchcenter.org/2014/01/abc-news-extremely-misleading-report-on-dangers-of-guns-in-homes/

    Putting the inaccuracies aside for a moment, as a mom I advocate for knowing the surroundings that your child is in. It’s so important on many levels. When my children are in an unfamiliar environment it is my duty to make sure they are in a safe environment (as much as possible.) So if they are at someone else’s house, I ask about a multitude of things – pets/animals, pools, knives, guns, to name a few.

    Yes you will note that I just said I ask about guns. I do. I do this because I want to know my children are safe. There are several questions that go with the general, “Are there guns in the home?” But I will say that most times my husband and I would prefer our children to be in a home where they will be well protected if a situation arises.

    The other side of this coin that is not mentioned at all in this blog post that I think needs to be bought up is child education. It is important to teach your children about guns. By teaching and training them you can reduce the curiosity effect. I know without a doubt in the world that my son (age 9) would not touch a firearm without an adult permission (and it must be an adult approved within our family circle.) Even so, with permission he follows safety rules and checks to make sure it is unloaded. He is more meticulous than some adults that I’ve seen. That is because we have trained him that this is important. Further, my daughter (age 3) also knows that guns are not to be played with. Although she is still younger she is starting to learn the same things her older brother knows. I know in just a few short years she will be just as meticulous as her brother.

  4. This is a great thing to consider. I rather be safe than sorry when it comes to my children. Thank you for this post!

  5. The government doesn’t know what else to do to push their agenda.First I don’t go to visit. Second, people with gun are very careful with them. Third government should worry about gangs, mafia and terrorist.

  6. I am a southern girl who loves to hunt and grew-up in a home with many guns. I am also a mom who wants nothing but the best for my child and the children who enter my home. I am pro-gun and pro-safety. I think it is reasonable ask if there are weapons in the home, but more important to ask how they are stored.

    Regardless of how safe I am, I cannot say for certain that even my best mom friends take the same precautions. I could assume they have their weapons safely stored, but why not ask when dropping off my child? If a friend becomes offend when I take precautions for the safety of my child, they aren’t really a friend.

    I appreciate this blog post and the thought it provokes. If this blog post was discussing pool safety and making sure a pool was properly secured, I am sure it wouldn’t be nearly as controversial. A pool, however, is just as deadly if not properly secured.

  7. If someone were to come up to me and ask if I have a gun well regardless if I have one or not i’m going to say yes. Instead of trying to scare everyone into getting rid of their guns why don’t we teach children gun safety. Even if you don’t own a gun in your home chances are a grandparent or other relative does. Start at an early age and continue to tell your children if you see a gun don’t touch.

  8. Sorry, but anyone who thinks having a gun in the house is *safer* for children is just dead wrong (pun intended), as proven by science and actual research. There is just absolutely no argument here, except an emotional one – people just don’t want to give up their guns and will grasp at any rationale they can come up with to keep them. I don’t understand why there is so much ignorance here when we’re in the information age and can easily search for (*credible,* non nra-funded) research conducted by reputable institutions. For instance, here’s an article that cites various studies showing how more guns just = more deaths. http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/hicrc/firearms-research/guns-and-death/ (And yes, accidental shootings are generally classified as “homicides.”) The US has 15 times the homicide rate of other first-world countries with strict gun laws. That fact alone should open more eyes; it is sick that people turn their heads to it because they want to be selfish and reckless (with a few exceptions from legitimate hunting families) and own these deadly toys.

  9. Here are some facts: http://www.nationwidechildrens.org/cirp-gun-safety

    I was one of those kids who grew up in a house with a hidden but not-locked-up gun. My parents had no idea my brothers and I knew where it was. WE would go and get it and play with it when they were not home. We showed it off to other kids. I was almost shot by my father one night when I was sleepwalking in the kitchen and mistaken for a burglar. Thousands of children are shot and killed or injured by their parents’ guns every year. Hardly a day goes by that this is not in the news. It is stunning to me that anyone is politicizing this. Look at the lengths we go to in terms of child safety, recalling car seats and cribs and Tylenol if a handful of kids are harmed–as we should. Yet we are not banishing guns, and if I had my way we’d have a lot more gun control. If I advocated for that in a blog post you could accuse me of having a liberal agenda. But what the OP is saying here is not about gun control. Iy’s about child safety in the face of real dangers. Nothing political about that. Making it political keeps us from protecting kids as we should.

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