It’s that time of year again, when even the coupons from the local plumber say, “don’t forget Mother’s Day!” Just… ugh!
Can I put this out there? I’m just not a huge fan of Mother’s Day.
Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s awesome to celebrate moms but… I don’t know. It seems so strange for me to be the target of this cookie cutter holiday, and I usually find myself in a bad temper on that Sunday. Here’s why:
- The pandering makes me feel like a freak. Look, I genuinely don’t want anyone to buy me jewelry, even on sale. I do like chocolate, but I’m particular about where it comes from. Fair trade, please. Sustainably grown, please. I don’t like to shop, most cards are just awkward, and I’d rather grow vegetables than display flowers. What I really want is a Mother’s Day special at a local tattoo shop, or maybe for my dentist to stay open during the weekend hours so that I don’t have to pay a sitter to get a cavity filled. And since those things don’t happen, it’s easy to wonder whether I’m the only person on earth who doesn’t long for a bouquet and candy.
- It reminds me of what I’ve lost. A million years ago, my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. I was actually pregnant for Mother’s Day but miscarried shortly afterwards. And my own mom died when I was 20. And my amazing and wonderful grandmothers have all passed away. And the aunts with whom I was close as a kid became distant after my mom’s death. It’s just not that fun to think about the mothers I’ve known.
- I can’t figure out how to spend the day. This is the same thing I don’t like about Valentine’s Day, actually. Too much pressure! I don’t want to try to have a fun day. I want to do something special and celebratory, but I don’t want anyone to feel like a failure if it goes awry. I don’t want to feel disappointed if things don’t work out.
- My mister is really bad with dates. Bless his heart, and I love him to bits, but man, he just does not remember birthdays or holidays or anything of that sort and ironically, although I find Mother’s Day off-putting from a theoretical standpoint, I do actually want to celebrate it on that day.
- I like restaurant brunch. But loud, busy, crowded places trigger my anxiety like nothing else. I would love to have fresh squeezed orange juice and a fancy egg dish on Mother’s Day, but you’d need a pack of wolves to drag me to a restaurant that weekend.
Tell me, am I the only mom who feels this way? Is anyone else less-than-jubilant about this upcoming Sunday? Maybe just for this year I should head off the stress at the pass and invite my local mom friends to my house for mellow celebrations. The holiday would probably be A LOT more fun that way.